Saturday, January 26, 2013

A Low-Effort Blog Post

I get a lot of "encouragement" to blog regularly and I think about it...I even have a few dozen unpublished articles written in the archives...but when I received an email from an unidentified Uncle, I decided to give in to the promptings.

I'll make some effort the next few days to write in detail about some of the things that have been happening, but tonight I'll just give a quick bit...

Today marks 232 days on the transplant list. Initially I had expected to have had the transplant, completed rehab, and been back to work by now. I was so off on my calculations!

Most of the time I feel peaceful and strengthened and patient. I feel those things deeper than I have any right to feel in my position. I can't help but credit the thoughts and prayers and fasting that is done in my behalf from so many people...I feel fortunate to be able to acknowledge that power in my life.

But occasionally, I give in to the worry and fear and desperation of so many unknowns. Since around Christmas, living in my body has felt increasingly difficult. I had begun to think that I was losing some emotional fortitude, so it was actually a big relief to hear on Thursday that my condition has worsened significantly and I would be scheduled for my 3rd Cardiac Ablation February 12. I am under the care of a new EP, Dr. Jared Bunch, who comes as highly recommend as Dr. Chun Hwang.

I can't help but look forward with a little unrealistic optimism...so I'm still hoping the new heart is here before we have to do the procedure in a couple of weeks. It could happen, right?